In times when I am around friends or family or especially strangers, It's a constant feeling of being judged on what he(our son) is doing. Will they think I taught him to act this way? Will they think we are bad parents? Will they think bad of him? Will they think bad of us?
This weekend he was invited to a B-day party, for days I tried to come up with any excuse in my head that he couldn't go. There were going to be 20 kids in a loud bowling alley. When Taylor get in a loud environment with a lot of kids, he starts to act out or even a little weird. I knew he wanted to go, so I shut my self up and took him. Low and behold, he was absolutely great! You never know. Very antisocial, but behavior wise he was great.
Now today a close friend stopped by and as soon as they get to our house he starts acting up. Making noises, flopping himself on the floor and being loud. This is when I get embarrassed. He won't stop if you ask him to, its like he has no idea how to act when he is nervous or in an awkward moment. These are reasons(not good ones) that I do tend to become antisocial myself when he is involved. I know he can't help it but still I sit there and keep asking him to calm down, tell you don't need to act like that. I hate that I am embarrassed by it.
We had also received some papers to fill out over the weekend, a secondary insurance that could help us pay for the tests and treatments the doctors want us to do. As I started to fill them out I stopped myself halfway through and thought to myself " If I fill these out and send them in and he is accepted we will have to go through with the testing. And if we do and they do say he has aspergers with the tourettes, where does that put him in life?" "Now he has a label(Which is related to autism)will he be denied anything in life because of it?" "Will insurance quite covering him for a preexisting condition?" All of these.
Then tonight I started reading my current book ASPERGER SYNDROME & YOUR CHILD and read this passage.......
"Asperger Syndrome shouldn't be though of as a frightening label-facing it honestly is the first step in getting wonderful support and help, and learning to help your child."
You can guess it, I finished filling out the paperwork. Hopefully we do the right thing.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
Tracee, I ABSOLUTELY hope you don't think that there was any reason to be emberassed in front of us! I know his situation and know what you are dealing with, so not to worry!
ReplyDeleteI am SO happy you decided to finish off the paperwork. I really feel like it is the best way to get him whatever help he needs or may need in the future. ((HUGS))
I know that at first you do tend to feel embarrassed, Tracee, but you just hold your head up high, and know that you're doing the very best that you possibly can for Taylor,,,and also; that he doesn't have much control over what happens.Please don't cater to anyone who may make rude remarks.
ReplyDeleteAlso; I don't think that you'll have to be concerned about an insurance company saying that this was a pre-existing condition when you just recently got the diagnosis.